Updates

I literally have had no time lately! Which is definitely one of the reasons blogging has taken a hiatus. I am currently furiously sewing for the Cutting Fashion show on February 9th (I'll give you more details as it gets closer so you can come!). All my looks are due this Saturday so I just need to be done by then. I'm so close but at the same time I feel like I still have so much to do! It's like my own little Project Runway, minus Tim Gunn and Heidi Klum, Mood fabrics (still wish I lived in New York just so I could go there whenever I want), and the fact that I don't have a nice big sewing studio haha. Everything is coming along nicely though. I met my models on Saturday when we had a rehearsal for the runway show. I love them. They're some of the nicest girls I've ever met.  We also had a designer photoshoot on Saturday so I got to get to know some of the designers better. The show is going to be so fun! I get more excited for it every day.

For those of you who haven't heard (which is probably most of you), I've decided to take a temporary break from school. I'm kind of close to graduating with about two-ish semesters left (but maybe more) but I really need a break. I was not doing super well in school and I wasn't motivated at all, so the decision was made for me to take some time off. It was a really hard thing to realize that I wouldn't be in school this semester and I cried a lot thinking about it. I mean, it's a scary thing not to be doing what I've been doing basically since I was five years old. It's scary to think about not following the exact plan I had in mind. But yeah, school's been hard for me to do lately so I need to take some time off. Temporarily of course.

Another sad fact of me not being in school is that I had to quit my job of three and a half years at the bookstore. My last day was on Friday and it was really sad to go. It's been an awesome job and I really love the people I work with. Thankfully though, I know we will keep in touch because we are such good friends. So I'm now officially jobless and school-less. I'm so grateful I have the fashion show to keep me busy while I'm searching for a job. Otherwise I might just sit around like a lazy potato (is there such a thing?).

It's sad that I won't be in school for a little bit, but it's the right decision. It's definitely what I need right now. And I have to say that it's taken a lot of stress off my back. I'm so glad that I don't have to stress over school and worry about any of that stuff right now. It's such a relief. A relief that I really need. :)

One more exciting thing about this semester is that my sister Carina is now in Provo going to UVU! It's been the best having her here. It's nice because I automatically have someone to hang out with or just chill with. We go grocery shopping together and can hang out whenever. Seriously though, I love it. I'm so happy she's here. It makes me feel more at home. :) She's also modeling in the fashion show for me which is extra fun.

Welp...that is the life update for now, because I know you were all dying to hear how I was. I'm doing good. Life is really happy and I am just so so excited for this fashion show coming up. You should plan on coming because it's going to be SWEET. Also, if any of you know of any jobs in the Provo/Orem/Utah county area, please please let me know, because I need to find something soon! I would love something full-time and am free at all times of the day. Seriously though, if you hear of anything let me know!

All About Gracie

I think probably for my own sake (for memories and stuff) I want to talk about each of my family members on here. Because I seriously love them a ton. So...here goes!

Today I'm going to tell you the story of Gracie (oh and these aren't going to go in any really particular order, fyi). It's a good thing blog post are all written, or you'd see me crying as I write this post because I love Gracie so so much. I don't think I knew it was possible to love someone as much as I love this little girl here. You've probably heard me talk about Gracie a lot on this blog, and sometimes you probably wonder, "How can a twenty year-old girl be so close with her five year-old sister?" Welp, I'll tell you. :)

Gracie is no ordinary child. She's kind of like a little miracle in our family. There are five of us siblings--me, Carina, Sidney, Cee Ryle, and Gracie--and everyone but Gracie is pretty close in age. We all range from 20 (almost 21 mind you) to 13 years old and we all pretty much grew up together. My parents actually always wanted six kids. Some of you might think five or six is a lot, but trust me, it's so fun. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way! After Cee Ryle, it was really hard though, because my parents kept trying to have children, and they were successful, at first. My mom sadly had a lot of miscarriages, which was really hard on them, but also for my siblings and I. We all really wanted more kids! My brother specifically wanted another brother.

I think maybe after the first miscarriage, I decided that every month I was going to fast to have another baby in the family. To explain, in our church on the first Sunday of every month we have fast Sunday where every able member (so everyone eight and older, because that's when you usually get baptized and become a member) of the church refrains from eating for 24 hours or like two meals. When you fast, it's to bring you closer to the Lord and it's for a specific purpose for whatever you need in your life at the time. Like when someone in the ward (which is our church community) is really sick or struggling, on certain occasions, everyone fasts for that person to get better. Fasting is sort of like added strength to your prayers. Also when we fast, we pay fast offerings, which is money for the food we would have eaten that day. (If you have any questions about this, you can ask me in a comment or email!)

So for a long time, every single first Sunday of the month, I would fast and pray so hard to have a baby in our family. I think I fasted for like 4-5 years. It was really hard, but I never gave up. I'll never forget the happiness and excitement I felt when I was fourteen years old and my parents told us we were having another baby. I was still really cautious, because of all the miscarriages. But when the baby kept staying healthy past the point that the other babies had miscarried at before, we started to feel so excited. I think with Gracie, it was different, because we had already experienced so much loss and it made me really scared to lose her. I wanted this little baby so bad.

my crazy family in November right before Gracie was born

And I guess Heavenly Father wanted us to have that baby pretty bad too, because on December 27, 2006, our beautiful Gracie Ann Brown was born, and our family was finally complete.

I love this picture because it's like she was saying hi :)

I think a sister was the best thing I got that Christmas. Going through all of that I think kind of explains why Gracie and I are so close. One, we got spiritually close because I fasted for her all of those years. Maybe she was just up in heaven hearing my prayers and wanting to come down to us so badly. And two, I understood loss before she came. I understood wanting another sibling, almost getting one, and then losing them. I always get really scared I'm going to lose Gracie in some way because she means so much to me. I think I have a taste of what being a mom feels like because in a way, I feel that love for Gracie.

Seriously though, I love that little girl more than anything in the world. We are best friends (no joke, she is my best friend!) and whenever I come home we have a lot of fun. We share a love for barbies, shopping, and dressing cute. She has the biggest attitude, and being the youngest by a long shot she definitely gets her fair share of spoiling, but we love her, so that's partially why. ;) Gracie for some reason loves Spiderman, so I got her a shirt that she wore yesterday :) She also loves getting her face painted, barbies (she loves them a lot, ok?), my little pony, purple, and Carrie Underwood. I definitely convinced her of the Carrie Underwood one but she came up with purple all on her own! It's so cute, she always makes an effort to give me purple things, like a purple cup, purple vitamins, or point out to me that she's wearing a purple shirt.

One of my favorite and funniest memories with Gracie is when I convinced her to be my roommate here at BYU. Somehow I legitimately convinced her that being with me all the time, having no parents to tell her what to do, and being at BYU would be the best thing ever. She was totally on board and was asking my parents if she could be my roommate! It was pretty sad when I had to convince her to not be my roommate after that (my mom wasn't too happy haha) and tell her she'd have to pay rent and she'd be gone from her parents and she wouldn't have been able to go to preschool. She cried because she wanted to be my roommate so bad. Maybe one day when I'm old and settled she can come live with me for a summer or something!

Gracie and I are the best of the best and truest of the true friends you will ever find. She always tells me to come home "way soon" so we can see each other a lot. Whenever I do come home, we see each other and go "Eeeeee!!!" because we're so excited to be together again. We cry when I leave and it's sad. I really do miss her when I'm in Provo. The hardest thing about us being so far apart in age is that I only lived at home for a few years of her life, and she won't even remember any of that. I want to stay close like this for the rest of our lives and I will definitely make a huge effort to!

So here's to my best friend Gracie. May we always be best friends forever and have so much fun...I hope the special connection we have always stays there and only grows stronger. I love you so much...Grace, Gracie Poo, Crackadoodle (she loves that nickname for some reason), Gracie Gracie Goose. I saw her this past weekend at my cousin's baptism and I can't wait to go home on Saturday to see her again!

I Love My Little Sis

Gracie (my five year-old sister) is the cutest. My mom sent me this picture that she drew of the two of us and it just melted my heart.

I love Gracie so much and she really is my "best friend," like how we always say. One of the things that makes me happiest about this picture is that Gracie still loves me and still thinks of me, even though I'm gone a lot and might not see her for at least a month. She was born when I was fifteen and I was out of the house before she even turned 3, so I was always worried she wouldn't really love me or remember me a ton. It's totally been the opposite though. I couldn't love anyone more than I love Gracie and she's always so happy to see me, as I am her. She's so cute too and always tell me I need to come home "earlier" and "not take so long" because she misses me. This summer will be sad and hard, because I'll be in Boston for 4 months, and I'll miss her like crazy. I just have to say that I am so happy to have a best friend like Gracie. I love that girl way too much for her own good. :)

Potter Fashion: a Bleached Pen Tee

My sister Carina made me this shirt with a bleach pen! Isn't it sweet?!?!!

Yes. Yes, it is pretty sweet. What is not so sweet is the fact that I have messy hair, am wearing no makeup, and pajama pants (because I was getting ready for bed when i remembered to take pictures). So just ignore that fact. Oh and also, you can see a bracelet on my right wrist in the above picture that Carina also made for me! It has my name on it. :)

Isn't Harry Potter awesome? And also do-it-yourself projects? Even better are the two combined! I would strongly recommend making a shirt as cool as this one with something as simple as a bleach pen! I am most happy and grateful for this shirt, so thanks Carina!

Oh and happy Wizard Wednesday!!! Say hello to the biggest Harry Potter fan in the world...he is pretty sweet too :)

My First Maxi Dress

Oh look! I decided to blog. Isn't that cool? Ha truth be told, I am so bored right now, which is actually a first for this summer. I feel like I've been sooo busy playing with friends every night, sewing (A LOT), working, reading, sleeping, and just doing fun stuff. I think it's been harder to blog this summer because I haven't worn a ton of "outfits" since it gets too hot to layer and it's so much easier to wear a t-shirt and shorts if no one is going to see you. Anyways, I really wasn't sure when I was going to pick up blogging again but I guess now is a good time to start and I'm gonna make it a habit again now that school's starting up.

I feel like saying "my first maxi dress" is like saying "my first doll" or "my first car" or something like that. It's kind of a momentous occasion considering maxi dresses are AMAZING! Holy cow I love this dress. And it's all thanks to the fact that I am shorter than my sister so something finally got handed up to me. :D

I'm currently sewing a maxi dress right now (it's kind of simple, but it's my own design!) and it is just going to be so gorgeous! I have been sewing a lot of stuff as of late. I just finished sewing a dress that I gave to my sister Carina for her birthday yesterday...

She loved it :) It made me so happy to see her happy!

....and I've also made two shirts and another dress and have done a few refashions. I really like sewing and designing very much. It just makes me happy and I could probably do it all day. Something I want to do so very badly is go to the Fashion District in LA and go shopping for fabric, because they sell it for like a $1 a yard!! Heaven! This is a very big dream of mine lately (and also while I'm there go to Disneyland, the beach, a broadway musical, and Hollywood). I'm going to try and save up, so I hope it happens soon.

I am glad to be back and I'm so excited for the new school year that starts on Monday! It went by so fast and it kind of freaks me out a little. AH! Can't wait for all the new things life throws at me though.. ;)

Oh...I am just so happy. Life is wonderful :)

Day 7: My Best Friend

Me and my best friend have known each other for a little over four years. We instantly connected and I love her to death. We go shopping together in the mall and at other stores, she shares my love of barbies, she loves modeling her outfits like me, she loves picking cute outfits and helping me pick mine, and we love doing each other's hair. We laugh like crazy together and I know that we'll be best friends forever. Also, both of our favorite singer is Carrie Underwood. :) And seriously, she's so amazing that I cry every time I think of this girl. I love her more than life itself and would do anything for her.

Bet you're dying to know who it is, huh?

Meet Gracie. My 4-year-old sister. Also my best friend. I seriously couldn't wait for this post because I wanted to write about her so badly.

Sorry about the photo overload. Ok, well no I'm actually not. Because I love every single one of these pictures and this is my blog so I can make it the way I want it. And also because I love Gracie. I'm dying to see her again and can't wait until it happens!

I have to say that Gracie is one of the greatest blessings in my life. She is my little ball of sunshine and always so happy. I can always count on her to say that Carrie Underwood is her favorite singer and that I'm her best friend. I can go to her to get away from life and play with barbies, and I know that when she's around I will have a shopping buddy if no one else will go.

Dang it, I'm crying as I'm writing this. Ha. :) I love you Gracie Ann. Age does not make a difference and I'm so glad that we can be together forever as sisters and I'm so grateful to have the best friend ever! I have no idea what I would do without you in my life. You make it so happy. I love you, best friend. :) :)

Picture Day!

I love love LOVE my new black boots! They're fairly similar to my brown boots (you can see them here, here, or here--or a lot of other posts), but now i have them in black! I already wore them yesterday and I'm wearing them today and I probably will tomorrow too. I wore this outfit for family pictures that we took today and the colors were black, white, gray and red. No red for me because I couldn't make it work but I liked this outfit a lot anyways.

It was such a busy day today! First we all went to Provo (where BYU, my school, is) and my relatives went and shopped at the bookstore and then helped me move my stuff from one apartment to the other. It was so nice of them and it got done super fast. I'm so excited to move!! Then we went to the capitol and took our family pictures (that's where these pictures were taken) which was lots of fun and really crazy with all the kids. Then the boys went to go see the Jazz game (we lost, sad day) and the girls went and saw Tangled for my sister/best friend's birthday (go here and here to see pictures of us). Tangled is the cutest and best movie EVER. I loooooove it. So just go watch it. For me? Ok thanks. Then after that, we were full of popcorn and needed "real food" so we went and got some delicious ice cream from leatherby's that I definitely did not finish though i throughly enjoyed. And then we went home. Good day? Yes.

And my blog is finally updated and I'm not letting it get un-updated (is that a word?) ever again. The end. :)

Happy birthday to Gracie, my 4 year old best friend. I love you soooo much. More than you know. Thanks for being the greatest friend and sister ever. You brighten every single one of my days. :)

White Tee: Down East Basics

Cardigan: Forever 21

Jeggings: Charlotte Russe

Boots: Gifted

Scarf: Dollar Tree

*Photos by Derick Fajardo*

Wintertime!

And...the sister/best friend pictures ;)

Can you believe we already got snow?! That's Utah weather for ya.. :) Usually I don't like snow before thanksgiving, but snow pretty much means Christmas is getting closer which means Christmas break which means two and a half wonderful weeks with my family! I cannot wait. Today Carina took pictures of me with my dad's nicer camera. It was fun! I can't believe I didn't think of using that a lot sooner, but now I'll use it on the weekends and breaks when I come home.

This is probably more of a summery outfit but I didn't really plan for the weather when I brought these clothes home, and I don't really care because I'm used to the cold since I've lived in Utah my whole life. I like these colors together though. I got this dress over the weekend at Forever 21 and I tried pairing a lot of other cardigans with it but nothing really worked except for this one. I think this one was good because the blue didn't drown out the bright pink and it also lengthens the dress, which is nice for a girl who is only 5'2". :)

And now, I'm going to go back to listening to Christmas music and maybe get some hot chocolate. I'm totally in the Christmas mood right now...26 days to Christmas break and 33 to Christmas...CAN'T WAIT! :)

Cardigan: Forever 21

Dress: Forever 21

Pink Shirt: Down East Basics

Shoes: Payless

Necklace: Forever 21 (borrowed from Carina)

dress