Hm, I've been trying to write every day but not sure what to post on this one! So I'm gonna just give myself five minutes and ramble. Sound good? You might want to wait and answer that one at the end of this post haha..

This week has been good. Life is pretty good. I'm really happy with the place where I'm at right now for the most part. Obviously there are some things that are always going to be a little hard, like right now dealing with stress is sometimes difficult, but isn't that how things normally go?

I'm feeling a little better this week, but I've had a lot of school projects and tests going on, as well as two time-consuming callings in church, and many other things, like wanting to be social and go to activities but also giving myself time to do things that I want to do, like making videos and sew and design and stuff. And I have to do the simple stuff too, like try and keep my room clean and eat food and find time to do my laundry! How does one do it all? I'm not really sure!

So yeah, the stress was kind of getting to me and I found myself being stressed to tears because I couldn't handle it all. Monday was hard and I found the theme for that day and the rest of the week to be "let it go" (frozen, woo!). Sometimes we just have to let things go! I'm a high achiever, which is not a bad thing, but when there is a lot on my plate, it can become so if I don't let some things out of my grasp. I don't have to be so in control and perfect at everything. It will be okay if I'm not. Easier said than done obviously.

But many things help...like my contemporary dance class (it reminds me to breathe!) where I can dance and move and escape the world for fifty minutes (totally not long enough) two times a week. Being around people is good because connection makes me happy and it keeps me sane. Sometimes when I'm having a week where I feel sad and kind of depressed, the last thing I want to do is go talk to people and be social, but it's often the best thing I can do. Not necessarily going and meeting people and doing the whole, where are you from?, what's your major?, how many kids are in your family? stuff because that's annoying, but just being with people who you get along with and can have fun with. I'm definitely grateful for classes because of that.

Anyway, I'm sure I could talk forever on this topic but I wrote longer than five minutes so I better go. But theme for this week: Let. It. Go. It will be okay!

Oh and this song is really great. I can't tell you how many times I've watched it but possibly like ten? Because I love it! It makes me feel good and who doesn't like that?



Gah, I love Taylor Swift. Most of us know this, I think. I've seen her in concert twice, and the last time I got lucky enough to be in the pit (if you want to read that amazing story, it's here!) and see her close up.

Anyway, her new album 1989 came out Monday. And...I loooove it. So much.

It's a totally different sound from before, and I think that if anyone was really surprised by this, they don't listen to her music enough. Taylor Swift started out as country, but she's kind of crossed over into pop since her second album Fearless, and if not in that, then definitely in Red. It had tracks like "I Knew You Were Trouble," "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together," "Red," and a bunch of others. And now 1989 is Taylor's first exclusive pop album.

I think I love it for several reasons...

1. It's a manifestation of herself. Taylor Swift is definitely not the same artist we first fell in love with. She's still super cute, dedicated to her fans, creative, and down-to-earth (for as much as a celebrity can be), but she's not a teenager anymore. She's almost 25, she's sooo famous, her look has changed (she started out with super curly ong hair and now its short and straight-ish, and I think her style is definitely more edgy, which obviously comes with age), and she's grown up. So it totally makes sense hearing her album. I think it'd be weird if she was still coming out with songs similar to her first album. Those are still amazing songs and I will always love them, but Taylor Swift is different, which means her music is going to be different too.

2. I LOVE the songs! I think I love them even more because it's a style of music that I've been really into lately..so even if I had no idea who Taylor Swift was and had just discovered her as an artist, I think I would still love them. They kind of match some of my favorite bands, like MS MR and Hunter Hunted so I think it's sweet.

3. Every detail is super thought out. The album cover, the title, the introduction, the booklet in the cd case, the polaroids that come with it--it's all super cohesive and it inspires me a lot! I'm always thinking about cohesion since I do collections in fashion shows and I love finding things that just go so well together and all kind of make each other even better because of that. (that might not make sense, sorry!)

4. It's Taylor Swift! And personally, I think she's pretty awesome. She is so connected with her fans, her music is very real and raw and always new--which makes her a great artist, she stays true to herself (she hasn't gone crazy like Justin Bieber) by being stable and grouded but also allowing herself to change, and she does what she loves in spite of what anyone else might say. She "shakes it off" (from her single "Shake It Off") and doesn't give herself time to hate those people either. I admire that so much because it's really hard to do. Also, in spite of all her haters, she is incredibly popular. She has such a big fan base!

5. I wasn't gonna write this one because it really has not much to do with her album, but can we all just agree that Taylor Swift has great style? She is always dressed classy and has seriously the cutest clothes. I think it always makes her look polished and herself, which is obviously great.

Anyway, listen to 1989, it's so good! Fav songs on it (so far, I've only listened to each of them like once or twice, besides the songs that came out before the album did): Style, Out of the Woods, I Wish You Would, How You Get the Girl, and Clean.

A photo posted by Kailee Cristina Brown (@kikicbrownee) on


Let's Try This School Thing Again..

As I have said recently, I'm back in school! After a year and a half of not being in it, it's good to be back, but in some ways it's also super weird. Like...

-most of the people in my classes are younger than me...like by at least a year or two. First day of Statistics lab and the TA asked the freshman to raise their hands, and there were a few, and then the majority were sophomores and juniors, and then they're like, "any seniors?" And my lone hand went up. When you add that up to me being a super senior, it makes me like three years older than all those kids. When I was in school two years ago, everyone was my age, maybe like a year or two younger, or a little bit older. Now I'm by far older than most. I was facebook stalking a bunch of my classmates and they are pretty much all freshman or sophomores. #timeformetograduate

-I walk...EVERYWHERE. I've given up on my legs not ever being sore. Especially because I seem to go to different places on campus every day so I don't even have a set routine for them to get used to. I have to go up a humongous flight of stairs every morning when going to school, and it's brutal. By the time I get to the top, I'm ready to collapse and am trying to mask my heavy breathing from all the fit people around me! So much walking. So many stairs! With a backpack! I also have a dance class where one day we worked so hard my abs hurt for like a week. Thankfully now I have my bike and I get everywhere like 3x faster..tis wonderful :)
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-I'm doing soooo much better. Like what? How? How did this happen? I do not know, but a year and a half break must have helped me in some way because I'm focused and LOVING school like I never have before. I legitimately enjoy all my classes and I love coming home from school and feeling productive just because I learned! I spend time doing homework and readings and I really love all my classes. And I'm doing fairly well in them! 93% on my stats test?? Giving regular speeches in my public speaking class and not being super nervous or making a big fool of myself (who is this girl?!)? yes yes YES!
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-vending machine food. yes, please, and thank you. Really though, I wouldn't mind some real food every once in a while ;)
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-I love having friends. I think I kind of forgot what it was like to have good friends at school (realizing how lame I must sound right now) because before when I was enrolled, I was bad at going to class or answering questions or just talking and I really didn't have any good friends. But I have school friends now! In like pretty much every class! Sometimes I don't always love group work, but I think it's been good because that's helped me meet and make friends with a bunch of new and cool people. I feel so much better after I'm a little bit social every day, rather than being holed up in my room watching netflix haha.
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-STRESSSS. No this isn't weird, but studying and homework and tests and projects and everything! Gah! Sometimes it's a lot. I love learning but the work that comes with the learning involves a little more motivation.
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-Wanna hear one more crazy thing. Graduating in JUNE!! Approved and everything. Happy dance people. Good stuff is ahead.
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(so basically now that I'm finally getting the hang of school, I have to go and then be confused all over again! what is this life?)


took my bike for a ride...

...and made a video!

Really, though, would you have expected anything less of me? ;) Also it was my first one edited in Adobe Premiere Pro so that I had some fun with that.

In other exciting news..Taylor Swift's new album came out today! You can bet I'll be listening to it aaaaaalll day week month LIFE long. So happy Monday to the world pretty much. And if you don't like Taylor, "the haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate!" haha.


Fashion Friday: The Making of an Haute Couture Gown, and Other Thoughts on the Fashion Industry

I realize the phrase "Fashion Friday" is nothing too original and sounds like something you might use in a kindergarten class, but it works, so bear with me here.. But whenever I see a cool or funny video or something to that effect, I bookmark it so I can watch it later if I want, or just have a funny youtube video marathon one day! So I have a bunch of cool fashion videos saved and I figured I'd share one every Friday because that sounds fun, right? Okay maybe it only sounds fun to me, but we're gonna do it anyway.

Today's video shows the process of making an haute couture look. It's a Christian Dior from their Spring/Summer 2011 haute couture collection. I realize it's seven minutes, which is kind of long, but if you at least watch the first two or three you get the gist of things. I couldn't help but watch the whole thing but that's because I love to sew and design and it all mesmerized me so much!

After watching this, I realized one of the reasons why haute couture is so expensive, because holy cow, that look must have taken ages to make. I love their meticulousness, with all the white thread sewn to keep the pieces together, how carefully and precisely they cut each piece of fabric, and how they treat everything so delicately. Oh and those pleats! That was really cool. Also the tulle layering had such a beautiful effect on the runway. It's kind of funny how they all wear white coats, it reminded me of a lab or something. I guess that's so they don't get the clothes they're working on dirty? Though it seems a little excessive to me.

Oh also, I wish those people who made these things got credited somehow! It seems a little unfair that the designer gets credited for the garment when it really seems like these people do the brunt of the work. That would be an interesting thing to look at and go more into depth on.

Something I've been struggling with lately in fashion is wondering what the point of it all is. A part of me can't help but think they're just clothes. But another part of me wants to ooh and ahh at the sight of it all because it is really really beautiful.

It can be pretty easy to get caught up in either extreme...hating the fashion industry because it can seem so pointless and shallow, or loving it all because of the beauty and thinking it's all perfect. It's not perfect. The fashion industry has flaws--many of them--that I'm trying to get past so that I can continue to do what I love. But it is a beautiful form of art as well and it has a right to be appreciated.

It definitely makes me feel something when I see a gorgeous garment and have to take a breath because it's just perfection. I love seeing that and I hope to one day create it. I'm working at it but I know I'm not even close to being there yet.

I guess it's just important to look at fashion with an eye from each perspective. It's good to be aware of the issues in the fashion industry and it's great to try and change those things for the better. And it's also still very much okay to love fashion in all its beauty and art. Right now I think I'm trying to figure out how to have a happy middle ground in between the two. It's kind of difficult, but I think it's very doable too.

Anyway, I think I'll probably talk more about that in the months to come...I'm giving a persuasive speech in my public speaking class on it and once it all comes together maybe I'll put a copy of the speech on here or just write a blog post on what I talked about. But for now, enjoy your Friday night and the rest of your weekend, I know I will! (And let's hope the Cougars can scrape out a win tonight against Boise State haha!)
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